The Truth of the Matter - critical essay about a friend

The Truth of the Matter

I'd like to tell you about a friend of mine that I've known for over two years. He goes to a support group at the Ardmore Public Library that I regularly attend. I really appreciate the friendship that I have with him however there are some concerns that I have about him that I feel I need to express. I'll detail those below.

First of all, I've questioned his honesty at times. He has made more than a few statements that are or seem to be untrue. I'd chalk some of these statements up to harmless exaggeration but not all of them. I'll give you a recent example to show you what I mean. About two weeks ago he told me that he saw a temperature display by the bank which according to him displayed a temperature of minus 11 degrees. I then told him that there was no way that figure was correct. This seemed to make him upset so I did not further challenge him on this point. The bank temperature display may well have showed -11 but out of common sense he should have realized that in no way was that number anywhere near being correct. It simply does not ever get that cold in Oklahoma. A few days I later learned that the lowest temperature in Oklahoma ever recorded was -2 degrees Fahrenheit. If I'm not mistaken, that temperature was recorded in 1932.

A month or so ago he asked some people from a local church to help him clean up his house. This was something that was badly needed. To say that the inside of his house was greatly cluttered would be an understatement. Well, they did a good job in cleaning up his house as I can attest to; the difference was quite dramatic. Then, a few days later he complained to me that some items were missing and that he believed the people from the church were to blame for this (the items were accidentally thrown away and/or stolen according to him). Among the items claimed to be gone were some DVDs that he checked out from the Ardmore Public Library and a CPAP machine (a medical device to help one with sleep apnea); more recently he mentioned that a silk shirt was missing.

I find it highly unlikely that any of the above items were in fact missing. Even less likely is the possibility that members from that church were in any way responsible. They did the man a big favor by cleaning up his house; they received no payment to do any of this work as it was all voluntered by them. I feel that his criticism of them was at least somewhat unjustifiable because they did all of this work for free plus the fact that he could've removed valuable items from his house beforehand so that there was no way they could have been thrown away. Consider that these items in no way appear to be trash thus it seems unlikely they would've been thrown away intentionally. He had the nerve to ask the church to replace the DVDs which are valued at $150 according to the library. I recall him telling the librarian that she needed to consult with his lawyer about the DVDs which the library demanded to be compensated for. I thought that was a rather odd statement for two reasons: I doubt that he has a lawyer (lawyers don't work for free you know; he is on a low fixed income which means that he probably doesn't have the funds to pay an attorney) and it seemed as if he was trying to absolve himself of any responsiblity in the matter by blaming the church. The librarian told him that getting a lawyer involved was not necessary. He and he alone was responsible for the return of the DVDs regardless of what may have actually happened to them. This makes sense to me. You can't for example blame your dog if he ate your homework as the old saying goes.

Another thing that I question is his integrity. Over four months ago myself, him, and my dad went to Wal-Mart after the meeting at the library. While there he asked my dad to loan him $20 to buy some clothes. My dad, being the generous person that he is, gave him the money. On more than one occassion he mentioned something about repaying my dad. On one occassion, he said something about getting the $20 from his accountant. I seriously doubt that he has an accountant as he is a person of limited means as I mentioned previously. Now he never says anything about this debt. My dad hasn't asked for payment but he should not have to. My belief is that a person should keep to their word. If you promise something to someone, you should keep your promise to that person unless there's a legitimate reason why you can't keep that promise. My sense is that my dad will never get his $20 back from him. Granted that this isn't a large sum of money but the principle of the matter must be considered here, I think.

He also seems to be an individual that seeks to take advantage of people. A good example of this is when he orders an expensive item off the menu at a restaurant when we're together with my dad. You see it's kind of a tradition that my dad and I (plus a guest maybe) eat out prior to the meeting. This seems improper to me because my dad is paying the bill. He has offered on more than occassion to treat us to dinner but this has never happened. Furthermore, he hasn't even offered to pay the tip which would only amout to a few dollars. If I were taken out to a restaurant where someone else was paying the tab, I'd not go overboard on ordering and I'd offer to pay all or part of the tip unless I was truly broke.

Another example of him trying to take advantage of my dad's generousity was when he asked him to pay for half of a gas stove. The stove that he had was quite old and didn't work anymore. My dad and I disposed of the old stove for him. He explained to my dad that he'd have his half of the payment in a week's time. A week went by and when the day came to get the stove he claimed that he didn't have the money. Also he asked my dad if he could pay his half later. My dad replied that wasn't acceptable. More than a year has gone by since then and to this day he still does not have a gas stove. I'm not certain about this, but I think he planned in advance to ask my dad to pay for all of the stove rather than coming up with half of the money as agreed.

I should mention that it's not my desire to be overly critical of him as he does have some good character traits. Everyone has positive and negatives aspects. I just wish he was more honest and trustworthy. It's probably safe to say that we'll continue to be friends in the future despite the issues that I outlined above. Guess what I should do is more critically evaluate statements from him that seem questionable in some way. Perhaps he'll come to realize the error of his ways but I really doubt this. I wonder if he realizes what he is doing or on the other hand he realizes that he is sometimes acting in a manipulative way.

Essay on a food I like - Sushi Anyone?

Sushi Anyone?

I recall years ago that my dad prepared for us shrimp cocktails. It tasted good but something was not quite right about it. After more than a few bites it occurred to me that perhaps the shrimp was not cooked. The shrimp was purchased at Wal-Mart from the seafood section where they sell uncooked frozen shrimp. I then asked my dad if he had cooked the shrimp. His reply was that he had not. We all had a good laugh about that. This would be my first experience with raw seafood.

Many years later on I went to a sushi bar over in Sherman, Texas. I ordered some tuna, smoked salmon, and salmon roe (eggs). My order included these items but it also came with eel due to some kind of misunderstanding, I guess. I tried everything except the eel first. You see I was kind of hesitant to sample the eel given what I knew about eels (their appearance kind of creeps me out you might say). I finally did taste the eel. It was not bad really and I guess I'd try it again I suppose.

I must admit that the idea of eating raw seafood was something that hampered my desire to try sushi for many years. I'm glad that I overcame that "food prejudice" because to me sushi is fairly tasty. If you haven't tried it yet, I suggest that you do so sometime. Sushi is usually consumed with wasabe and fresh ginger root. Wasabe, which is similar to horseradish, as with ginger, is a great complement to the sushi. My understanding is that the wasabe in many restaurants is actually horseradish that has been dyed green the reason being that real wasabe is expensive.

Essay about sorrow - On a Shooting Star

On a Shooting Star

It was sometime in 1998 that I met Katherine (usually called her Kathy). I found her online using the ICQ chat program. She was an accomplished architect. To this day you can see some of the structures that were built using her designs in Durant, Oklahoma. At the time I met her she was 36 years old. I was 29. We really had a lot of good times together. I thought highly of her.

One day I recall --- in the summer I think it was --- her and I looking at a meteorite shower. She brought out her camera to take photographs of the night sky. You see she was also a photographer. We saw several meteorites --- popularly known as "shooting stars" --- that night. I don't think we ever got any good photos of any meteorites but more importantly we had a nice time together.

We generally got along very well and we enjoyed the company of each other. There were basically two topics that might (and did on a few occasions) cause an argument. One was politics and the other was religion. Our political discussions usually did not become heated. Religion was another matter. I recall one day that we were discussing the existence (or lack of) of God. I kept trying to convince her that God was indeed real. Sad to say that this particular argument became way too heated. In response to this argument, like an idiot, I sought the comfort of a woman that I had been speaking to on the Internet --- a woman that years later I regretted in having ever met. Kathy and I, save for one day a few years later, never got back together again. In retrospect, I can't understand why I did what I did. I should have agreed to disagree on this point of contention. I mean after all no one will agree with someone on everything, right? I learned a hard lesson that day. What I learned is that one should not try to force their beliefs on someone else and you always have to keep your anger in check.

I recall a discussion that we had concerning tax reform. I was advocating a national sales tax --- something that I advocate to this very day --- to replace the income tax system. Kathy thought that a flat income tax would be a better choice. I told her that I thought that I was right but that her idea certainly had some merit. About anything was better than the morass that is the U.S. tax code, in my opinion. I mention all of this to show you the kind of conversations that I could have with her. It is indeed rare to find someone you can really talk to and have a fun time with.

One day I got in a bad argument --- an all out verbal fight really --- with the woman I now was with. This argument, like the one mentioned earlier with Kathy, was centered on religion, however this time I was completely justified in my anger. I won't go into the details of that here but suffice it to say that I was extremely troubled about the outcome of it. She told me that she never wanted to see me again. I took her at her word for that.

A day or so after this argument I got a hold of Kathy. A little after contacting her we decided to meet. After I met her we spoke briefly and then we kissed for some length. It was as if I had never parted from her. We then went over to her place to hang out in the pasture. By the end of the day we were both severely sunburned. Despite that we had a nice time together. Later that day I ran into the woman that I spoke of earlier. She begged me to take her back. Again like a fool I did as she asked. Years later I realized that she is a very manipulative person who was really good at playing on a person's emotions. She could make up a good story and her tearfulness was compelling. Sad to say I never saw Kathy again. Before I parted with her I recall her telling me that I was immature. She was totally right about that. Looking back on it now, I can't understand why I ever involved myself with this woman and why I took her back. This makes no sense to me. Fortunately I finally did completely part ways with her (this was in 2007). My emotional health has been much better ever since then. I just wished that I could have spent some more time with Kathy.

A year or so later I heard from Kathy online. She mentioned to me the promise that I made to her to celebrate her next birthday with her at Red Lobster. I really wanted to be with her but I feared what would happen if I did. It is now crystal clear to me that the woman I was with is a very unstable individual. At that time though I was given to fearing from her threats and manipulative actions. It saddens me to say that I missed Kathy's birthday party.

After another year (or thereabouts) had passed by I learned that Kathy had died. You see she was in a bad car accident before I met her. She had internal injuries that she had never fully recovered from. There was a memorial service held for her. I could not bring myself to go to it. In retrospect, it was something that I probably should have gone to. You see I wanted to remember her the way that she was. During the latter years of her life she was involved in volunteer work. I sensed that something had changed about her. My belief is that she may have found the Lord. I certainly hope that she did. Perhaps then I shall meet her again some day? I may have received a sort of answer to these questions because one day I was standing on the back porch of my house when I asked God what became of her. Suddenly I saw a meteorite streak through the sky. Possibly that was His way of saying yes to my questions. In any case, it was a moving experience to me.

Essay on something I hate - The Virtues of Polite Driving

The Virtues of Polite Driving

I don't hate many things but something I do hate is ill-mannered drivers. Haste, bad manners behind the wheel, and reckless driving are probably the cause of more than a few traffic accidents. Being inconsiderate when driving is not only bad manners it can be dangerous as well. Drivers have a responsibility towards other drivers who share the road with them.

One good example of inconsiderate driving is when someone passes you only to turn off a minute or so later. What may I ask is the purpose in that? The more logical thing to do would be to wait until you're ready to turn off. Anxiousness, I guess, is the cause behind this sort of behavior. It should be noted that passing is said to be one of the more risky maneuvers in driving. For this reason it's sensible to only pass someone as necessary.

Some example of bad driving are more of a source of aggravation than endangering others. Not switching off the high beams on your auto as you're approaching an incoming auto is certainly not a nice thing to do but it usually does not result in an accident. Leaving the high beam on while driving closely behind someone is also annoying.

When you drive please consider others on the road. I think the old adage "Do unto others as you would have them to do unto you" certainly applies to driving. Rudeness is never called for when driving. Good driving manners will not only keep people in a better mood it will also cut down on traffic accidents as I mentioned earlier.

Five best essays based on first line

1) Going Out for a Walk

It is a fact that not once in all my life have I gone out for a walk.

2) A Piece of Chalk

I remember one splendid morning, all blue and silver, in the summer holidays, when I reluctantly tore myself away from the task of doing nothing in particular, and put on a hat of some sort and picked up a walking-stick, and put six very bright-coloured chalks in my pocket.

3) The Execution of Tropmann

IN JANUARY OF THE CURRENT YEAR (1870), while dining in Paris at the house of an old friend of mine, I received from M. Du Camp, the well-known writer and expert on the statistics of Paris, quite an unexpected to be present at the execution of Tropmann---and not only at his execution: it was proposed that I should be admitted to the prison itself together with a small number of other privileged persons.

4) Hashish in Marseilles

PRELIMINARY REMARK: One of the first signs that hashish is beginning to take effect "is a dull feeling of foreboding; something strange, ineluctable is approaching...images and chains of images, long-submerged memories appear, whole scenes and situations are experienced; at first they arouse interest, now and then enjoyment, and finally, when there is no turning away from them, weariness and torment.

5) Leaving the Movie Theater

THERE IS SOMETHING TO CONFESS: your speaker likes to leave a movie theater.

Five essays that I might like to write someday

1) Fastest Turtle in the West

A lot of people think that all turtles are slow but this could not be any
further from the truth.

2) The Mysterious Traveler

Some day you will be one.

3) The Still Small Voice

God speaks to us in many different ways.

4) Mind Travel

Just where is your mind?

5) Dreamscapes

Dreams are a funny thing.

What kind of personal essayist might you be?

I. The Conversational Element (xxiv-xxv). Would you describe yourself as someone who often feels ambivalent about issues? Are you the kind of person who has lots of doubts? Do you make a habit of examining your doubts?

I usually have a clearly formed opinion on any given issue. As for doubts I do have a few. Probably would be accurate to say that I examine them often.

II. Honesty, Confession, and Privacy (xxv-xxvii). Would you describe yourself as a private person or do you tend to be more of an "open book"?

I'd probably classify myself as being somwhere in between those two extremes. I'm guarded on a few aspects of myself but generally open on most things.

III. The Contractions and Expansions of the Self (xxvii-xxix). How comfortable do you feel about talking about your flaws or things you've done in the past that embarrass you now? Are proud of your knowledge of a particular subject?

I generally am comfortable about talking about my flaws unless it's something of a very personal nature. I tend to be a very introspective person at times. There are a few subjects where I somewhat pride myself on knowing about. If I don't know a particular subject very well I'm quick to point that out because of my high desire not to mislead or misinform someone.

IV. The Role of Contrariety (30-31). How comfortable do you feel expressing an opinion that you know others will disagree with?

Generally speaking I'm comfortable expressing a dissenting opinion if I know that I'm sure of my facts otherwise I tend to remain mainly silent.
V. The Problem of Egotism (31-32). Do you worry that writing about your personal life in detail is a sign of egotism or vanity?

My rule here is that if I strongly believe that something about myself is very interesting I feel largely comfortable writing about that.

VI. Cheek and Irony (32-33). How comfortable do you feel making fun of yourself? How do you feel about mocking other people?

I usually am comfortable being self-deprecating the reason being is that I don't wish to take myself very seriously. As for mocking other peoiple, I generally avoid doing that unless I know I'm on safe ground. I certainly don't want to offend someone.

VII. The Idler Figure (33-35). How do you feel about wasting time? Are you the kind of person who likes to have a strict schedule that you can stick to or do you prefer not to have a schedule at all and let things happen spontaneously?

A mix of both I guess. I wouldn't classify myself as a very structured person. My belief is that too much structure interferes with the creative process.

VIII. The Past, the Local, and the Melancholy (35-37). Do you often find yourself looking back at past experiences and reflecting on how they shaped the person you are today?

As I mentioned earlier, I tend to be fairly introspective the reason being that I'm always trying to improve myself as a person.

IX. Questions of Form and Style (37-41). Would you say you feel more comfortable writing narratives or writing arguments or writing reports? Do you like to read texts that take a straight path from A to B or do you prefer to read texts that meander into unexpected places?

A mix of all of these is what I like generally speaking. One does have to be careful with digressions though as they can confuse the reader at times.

X. Quotation and the Uses of Learning (41-42). Would you describe yourself as someone who is well-read? Do you like to quote others in your own writing? Do you like to write about what others have written?

I'm probably not as well read as I need to be. This is something that I'm working on. I do like to quote others in my writing (usually in a limited way). Sometimes I will write about what others have written but generally speaking I try to create matter that is completely original.

XI. The Personal Essay as Mode of Thinking and Being (42-45). Would you describe yourself as someone who is open to a radical change in your life right now?

Probably not unless there is a very good justification for that. That said I'm usually open to change albeit small changes.

On Writing

Writing, a form of written communication, serves many purposes. Writing is used to express ideas, concepts, facts, and other bits of information. The purpose behind writing may be to inform, entertain, persuade, or some combination of these three.

Writing is oftentimes targeted towards a particular audience. The audience may be adults, children, other writers, politicians, a specific age range, a particular demographic, etc. The writing is crafted in such a way with the hope of appealing to a particular group or it may be written to appeal to a general audience.

A benefit of writing is to get one’s ideas down on paper. This is helpful because it allows one to crystallize their thinking. Once one’s ideas are written down they may be edited, further refined, and reviewed by others.

Another benefit of writing is its ability to share ideas with one another. Other forms of communication, such as visual or spoken, are also effective in this regard but they generally lack the ability to be edited one of the strengths of writing. Writings can be developed over time. The author of a work can even revisit that work years later after it has been written. A poetry archive that I’ve been developing since 1997 is a good example of this. Time and the increase in my writing capability has allowed me to make refinements that otherwise might not have been made.

Truly writing is a powerful form of communication. Millions of works are available for people to enjoy ranging widely in subject and tenor. Writing enables writers to creatively express themselves.